How to Be Your Own Best Friend

Embrace Your Inner Snoopy!

Pigpen is always surrounded by a cloud of dust, no matter where he goes. It’s part of his identity, and he never seems to mind—but for those of us observing him, that dust cloud is annoying. It follows him everywhere, an ever-present reminder of the chaos he creates.

In some ways, I’ve realized I’m not so different from Pigpen. My “dust cloud” looks a little different, though.

Instead of dirt, my dust cloud is a constant flurry of activity—busyness, endless to-do lists, and a steady stream of distractions. It keeps me moving, always doing, and rarely pausing long enough to simply “be.”

Recently, I realized my dust cloud of busyness is more than just a habit. It’s a way of running from myself—of avoiding the stillness where I might encounter, embrace, and befriend my True Self.

Running from Ourselves

Like me, have you ever noticed how easy it is to get lost in distractions?

We’re constantly moving, working, or seeking the approval of others. Sometimes, we don’t even realize we’re doing it.

We’re running away from ourselves.

Why? Because, often, we’re afraid to face who we truly are.

Maybe it’s because we don’t feel “good enough,” or maybe we’re afraid of confronting our flaws and insecurities.

It’s easier to seek external validation from others than it is to turn inward and validate ourselves.

But this constant search for external approval can leave us feeling empty, disconnected, and unfulfilled.

We end up chasing something “out there” while avoiding the work of becoming comfortable with who we are “in here.”

This busyness dust cloud blocks us from doing the inner work necessary to shed our false, egoic self and grow into the authentic person, the True Self, God created us to be.

The Misunderstanding of Self-Love

One of the reasons we struggle with self-love is that, for many of us, we’ve been taught it’s better to love others than to love ourselves.

Growing up, we may have been told, “Don’t be selfish,” or “Think of others first.”

These teachings often leave us believing that self-love is wrong or unnecessary.

But here’s the truth: self-love is not selfish. It’s an essential part of experiencing wholeness in our lives.

If we don’t love ourselves, how can we love others or love God?

Jesus gave us a clear framework for how these three elements—loving God, loving others, and loving ourselves—are intertwined. He called it the “law of love.”

In Matthew 22:37-39, Jesus says:

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Notice that Jesus doesn’t just say, “Love others.” He includes “as yourself.”

Loving ourselves is not an afterthought—it’s an essential part of this commandment.

It’s like a three-legged stool—love God, love others, and love yourself—each part is necessary for balance and wholeness.

If one leg is missing, the whole stool collapses.

Similarly, without self-love, our relationships with others and with God become out of balance as we cling to outside approval or compare ourselves to others as either better or worse than ourselves. 

Befriending Yourself: A Practical Guide

So, how do we begin to befriend ourselves?

How can we move beyond running from who we are and start embracing our True Self?

Here are a few practical steps the Holy Spirit’s been teaching me that I’ve incorporated into my journey:

Practice Self-Compassion

When you make a mistake or face a challenge, be kind to yourself. Instead of harsh self-criticism, practice self-compassion. Speak to yourself as you would to a dear friend with encouragement, compassion, and patience.

Monitor Your Self-Talk

Our self-talk—the internal dialogue that runs through our minds—shapes how we see ourselves and interact with the world.

Negative self-talk like “I’m not good enough” or “I’ll never succeed” can erode confidence and peace of mind.

When you notice a negative thought, pause and challenge its truth.

Replace it with a realistic, affirming message such as “I’m learning and improving every day” or “I am worthy as I am.”

By shifting your inner dialogue, you create space for growth and self-compassion.

Embrace Silence

Silence can be uncomfortable, but it’s in the quiet moments that we can listen to our hearts and connect with God.

Spend some time alone reflecting, praying, or journaling.

This helps us get reacquainted with who we really are without the distractions of the world.

Limit Social Media

Social media can be a trap, especially when it comes to comparisons.

Take a break from the constant influx of external validation and focus on activities that nurture your soul—whether that’s reading, spending time in nature, or engaging in a hobby you love.

Set Healthy Boundaries

Learn to say “no” when necessary.
Protect your peace and prioritize your well-being.

Boundaries are a form of self-respect, and they allow you to love others well by first loving yourself.

Affirm Your Self-Worth

Remember you are valuable not because of what you do but because of who you are.

You are created in the image of God, and the Creator declared you are “very good” (Genesis 1:31).

Embrace your inherent self-worth and live from a balanced place of self-acceptance.

Embrace Your True Self

As I’ve been reflecting on my journey, I’ve come to understand that befriending ourselves isn’t a one-time event—it’s an ongoing practice. It requires patience, kindness, and a willingness to face both the light and dark parts of who we are. 

As we begin to embrace our True Self, we draw closer to God and experience a deeper love for others.

Pigpen or Snoopy? Which Do You Choose?

Let me offer you an invitation:

How about we stop being like Pigpen, surrounded by the dust cloud of busyness and distraction? Instead, let’s take a cue from Snoopy.

Have you noticed how Snoopy is always in love with himself? He’s carefree, happy, joyous, and free.

Whether he’s dancing on top of his doghouse, dreaming of grand adventures, or simply soaking in the sunshine, Snoopy radiates self-acceptance and contentment.

He reminds us that life is meant to be embraced, not just endured.

This week, take a step toward being more like Snoopy. Let go of the need to constantly do and achieve and, instead, celebrate who you are.

Dance a little, dream a little, and bask in the joy of simply being.

Remember, you are loved, you are enough, and you are exactly as God intended you to be.

May you find peace in knowing that self-love is an important part of your spiritual journey.

Take time this week to practice self-compassion and affirm your self-worth.

As you practice loving yourself, may you experience the wholeness that comes from loving God, loving others, and loving yourself.

-brian j plachta

brianplachta.com

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