Don’t Go It Alone! How to Build Your Circle of Trust

This Week’s Focus: Creating Your Circle of Trust

The Problem: Going It Alone

Life can feel heavy when we try to go it alone. Many of us know the ache of loneliness—even if we’re surrounded by people. Without a small circle of trusted companions, it’s easy to lose perspective, drift into discouragement, or forget who we truly are.

The Solution: Community that Grounds and Uplifts You

The antidote is surrounding yourself with a circle of trust: a small group of people who inspire you, encourage you, and reflect back both who you are and who you are not. These are the companions who help us stay grounded, who remind us of God’s presence when we forget, and who lift us up when life gets tough.

Jesus Models the Importance of Community

When Jesus performed his first miracle of changing water into wine, the human part of him may have wondered: Am I really the Messiah? Am I the one the Torah speaks about—the one God called to show people the path of unconditional love?

To discern his Father’s call, Jesus went to the mountaintop for forty days. Once he was certain, the first thing he did when he came down was surround himself with community—men and women who would not only learn from him but also encourage and inspire him. That first circle of trust became the foundation of his ministry.

Like Jesus, we are formed and shaped by the people who surround us.  Life is a team sport—we can’t do it alone.

Science Affirms What Faith Teaches

Modern science and psychology affirm this ancient truth:

• Neuroscience shows we’re wired for connection—our brains release oxytocin, the “bonding hormone,” when we feel safe and supported by those in our community.

• Psychology reminds us that belonging is a core human need, essential for mental health and growth.

• Research shows the most consistent predictor of health, happiness, and longevity isn’t wealth or success—it’s the presence of close, supportive relationships.

A Short Story

After my four children headed off to college, I realized I had been so busy raising a family and building a legal career I had no close friends in my life—men who shared my hunger for God, who valued deep conversation, honest reflection, and mutual encouragement.

So, I asked God for the gift of a few spiritual friendships. In time, two friends appeared as an answer to prayer. Along with my wife, family, spiritual director, and faith tradition, these spiritual friends have become a strong part of my community.

Over time, those friendships became a lifeline—my circle of trust. They continue to inspire me, challenge me, and remind me who I am and who I am not. You can read more about spiritual friendships and how to build your own Circle of Trust in my book, Finding Flow: Spiritual Practices to Reclaim Inner Peace, Balance, and Wholeness. Listen to the audiobook here. Get the Kindle or paperback here.

Now It’s Your Turn

Stepping back to ask, Who’s in my Circle of Trust? is an important practice. It invites gratitude for the companions God has already placed in your life, and it also helps you discern who might be missing—those people you may need to invite to fill the gaps.

To help you do this, I’ve created a simple Who’s in Your Circle of Trust? Quiz  you can download for free. It will help you name the people in your circle and see who might be missing.

?  Click here to access your free gift.

Practical Tools & Action Steps

Here are ways to deepen your Circle of Trust this week:

• Download & Take the Quiz – Use the free Circle of Trust Quiz to map out who is in your Circle today and see where there might be gaps.

• Reflect with Questions – After the quiz, take a few minutes with these reflection questions:-Who are the people God has already placed in my Circle of Trust?

1. Who might God be inviting me to seek out or welcome into my Circle?
2. What qualities do I most value in a trusted friend or mentor?
3. -Who puts me in their Circle of Trust?

• Invest in Connection – Reach out to one person in your Circle this week. Schedule coffee, a walk, or a meaningful conversation. Circles of trust grow stronger through intentional presence.

• Express Gratitude – Each day, thank God for one person in your Circle. Then, tell that person you appreciate them. Gratitude strengthens both your spirit and your relationships.

Go Deeper

Read more about building your personal Circle of Trust in my book, Finding Flow: Spiritual Practices to Reclaim Inner Peace, Balance, and Wholeness. You can find it in audiobook, Kindle and paperback.

Stay Tuned

Next week we’ll look at the fourth pillar of wholeness in the divineFlow lifestyle: discovering your spiritual gifts.

You’ll also receive a free Spiritual Gifts Inventory to help you discover what your gifts are and how God has uniquely hard-wired you.

Until then, may you continue to experience a quiet mind as you integrate the pillars of divineFlow into your life.

Blessings,
brian
brianplachta.com